Change the World

I listen as you talk with your friend from school through the playstation. Your voice beginning to slowly deepen. And I wonder where this not quite a child not yet a man came from.

I peeked into your room last night after you fell asleep. I could always see the face of my little boy while you slept, but this time I saw the face of a teenager.  A foreshadowing I suppose.

I hear the leader in you surfacing as you play the game with your friend. The leader I worry is lost at school as you come home and talk of those who insult you. Of the friends who do not understand your sense of humor. Yes my sarcastic streak has come back to haunt me.

Your artistic ability amazes me. Yes many can learn to draw, but from an early age you’ve had the ability to see an object and sketch it. I believe it’s a God given gift. You’ve learned the skill of stepping back from your art, looking at it from a distance seeing what to change. Still you often doubt your ability.

Can I be honest and tell you I have no idea how to parent you through these years? You ask so many questions and I have no idea how to answer them. Today you asked if car markers put “objects in mirror are closer than they appear” just so no one will get too close. When I replied the warning is there most likely because the mirror might cause some distortion you didn’t like that answer. Telling me you thought there would be a smarter answer than that.

When your brain cannot wrap itself around an answer you automatically argue that it must not be the right answer. As intelligent as you are there is still much you can only learn with growth and maturity.

This scenario plays itself out multiple times a day. When I don’t know an answer and say we can look it up you become very agitated saying I shouldn’t have to look it up.

You ask why the number exactly in between rounds up when it isn’t really closer to the higher number than it is the lower number. And then you ask who decided this.

So is it any wonder I have no idea how to parent you? Yet this is one of the traits I love so much about you. Your curious nature will be an amazing asset one day.

You’ve recently changed your mind about becoming an architect. You’ve now decided to become a lawyer. You do like to argue and you would be able to go to the University of Alabama instead of choosing between Auburn and Georgia Tech for architecture school. Being a part of a huge Alabama family the thought you might have to go to Auburn was very disturbing to you.

It worries me though that you dwell on such grown up aspects. You are not even twelve yet. Perhaps being an only child you’ve spent so much time around adults you consider yourself one.

I struggle daily with this parenting thing. Your personality traits that drive me insane are also the ones I love most about you. And one day those traits will be your best assets.

I keep reminding myself that children who question why are the ones who change the world.


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Life: Unmasked

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