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I Was Supposed to Have Been a Princess & My Not So Servant’s Heart

April-093

Romans 7:6 — “……..and now you can really serve God; not in the old way, mechanically obeying a set of rules, but in the new way, [with all of your hearts and minds.]” TLB (emphasis mine)

I was supposed to have been a princess. Most days having a servant’s heart escapes me. It doesn’t come easily for me at all.

Especially with the mundane chores of running a household. The laundry never seems to stay caught up. The house never seems to stay clean. It all seems quite pointless at times. Why bother when it’s going to get messed up again tomorrow?

Sometimes my conversation with God goes like this:

Me: “God. You know I was supposed to have been a princess.”

God: “Oh really?”

Me: “I was supposed to have maids and servants to do all this stuff. It’s really not fair.”

God: “So you think I made a mistake making you who you are and giving the life I’ve given you?”

Me: “Wellllll……I guess not…..”

God: “Are you not my child? A princess in my kingdom?”

As a little girl I always had my basic needs met. We weren’t poor but definitely not upper middle class. I had everything I needed and some of my wants were also met. But I had to take on more adult responsibilities at a younger age than most of my peers due to my mother’s illness. I guess that’s where my dislike for housework & laundry began. It just didn’t seem fair.

Fast forward to today and honestly struggling to have a servant’s heart affects almost every aspect of life for me. It’s a heart issue. An attitude issue. If there’s a reward for doing something, a pay off, then my attitude is a bit better if it’s going to help me.

The one exception is where my closet and dearest friends come in. There’s almost nothing I won’t do for these friends. I’d walk to hell and back with them and expect nothing in return.

But would I do even the smallest thing for just any stranger off the street or even a casual acquaintance? Probably not. Not without expecting something in return.

And there’s where my problem lies. Christ calls us to have a servant’s heart. So I daily have to remember to pray. It’s hard pushing all those selfish attitudes away.

But I try. I try to remember to pray for my husband and son as I fold the laundry and do the mundane tasks of housework.

I try to remember that the poorly dressed mother screaming at her child in Walmart is loved by God just as much as I am.

I try to remember that it’s only by His grace I have the blessings He has given me.

I’m human and I fail, but little by little and day by day God is working on my heart. I just have to be willing to let Him show me how He sees them and how He would love them–by serving them.

In the end I am a child of God. An imperfect one at best, but I am a princess. I’m just a princess called to be a servant.

What about you? Are you a princess struggling to have a servant’s heart?

  • Jessica - June 3, 2011 - 6:33 pm

    Umm…yes. Especially tonight when the kids just.keep.screaming.
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